Daniel: it's already raining.
Angelina: So what? Take an umbrella and go !!
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Mother : Why arent you doing very well in History?
Son: Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born.
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Two stupid girls were driving to Disneyland. The sign said: Disneyland Left. So they started to cry and headed home
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How come when your wife is pregnant all their female friends rub their tummy and say congratulations but no one rubs your balls and says good job?
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My Lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for my Birthday. They gave me a Rolex. I think they misunderstood when I said "I wanna watch.''
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